I challenged my teenage advanced class to come up with the dodgiest local textbook they could find, and they have not disappointed me. Here are some of my favourite extracts so far:
"You can get ahead start".
For fellow teachers/grammarians:
"On June 28, 1996 the Supreme Rada of Ukraine has adopted the Constitution of Ukraine". (ouch!)
Whilst reading a book:
"I idly turned the leaves".*
*in Russian leaves and pages is the same word.
A typical Soviet English conversation:
Customer: One loaf of white bread, please.
Shop-assistant: Sorry, but it isn't fresh.
Customer: What is fresh?
Shop-assistant: Only buns are.
Customer: Two buns, please.
Shop-assistant: Here you are. 10 copecks, please.